Hype-icane Sandy Upgraded to Category “OMGpanic!”
Posted by MichaelGroff on October 26, 2012 | Filed under Podcasts
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It’s been given many colorful names, carries a dubious reputation and portends a significant weather impact on the east coast of the United States. At this point it’s rather difficult to assess what might be packing the stronger winds, hurricane Sandy or the hype machine surrounding the storm. As of early Saturday the storm is forecast to move north-northeast parallel to the U.S. east coast before making an unusual turn toward the northwest. This sudden course change would lead to the center of Sandy making landfall between Washington D.C. and New Jersey. In an unusual, albeit not entirely unprecidented one-two punch, the storm and it’s deep tropical moisture would become wrapped into a cold low pressure system from southern Canada. This merging of storms could result in a furtherance of heavy rain and wind to the south and possible heavy snow to the north.
After observing coverage of this system from outlets such as the weather channel, CNN, Fox News and others, it almost seems as though this is some unheard of scenario. Evidently, meteorologists have forgotten that hurricane season runs through November 30th and that a similar, although not identical, weather pattern occurred in the end of October 1991. The media has attached cutesy names to the system, such as “Frankenstorm” in honor of it’s expected arrival around Halloween (Tuesday or Wednesday). While this is cute, it’s hard to imagine this storm will live up to the massive destruction, heavy precipitation and wind forecasts that some predict. Nevertheless, one shouldn’t let their guard down from the Carolinas to Maine as this could still prove to be a significant weather maker.
For now, we’ll err on the side of climatology, logic and the laws of physics and say that this is not The Day After Tomorrow type of storm and to expect some wind, rain (or snow) and some chilly temperatures. Your house will probably still be there and casualties should likely stay under one million.
10 Days and Counting
With campaigning at a fevered pitch with just ten days to go, the polls are tighter than ever both nationally and in key “swing” states. Governor Mitt Romney now leads President Barack Obama by a margin of 51-46 percent in the latest national Gallup poll. While in Ohio and Wisconsin (both considered vital states) the two candidates are deadlocked at 49-49 and 48-48 respectively.
Could Benghazi Affect the Outcome
While a tragic event such as a terrorist attack on a foreign embassy might not be a difference maker in overall polling data, it is entirely possible that with such a close race anything could happen. The questionable circumstances surrounding the attack on the U.S. consulate in Libya and the possible cover up by government officials, the Obama administration and perhaps even the president himself, may be enough to sway the few undecided voters that remain.
Lie Big or Go Home
You’re in a very close race with less than two weeks to go and your message isn’t getting through, what do you do? If you’re Vice President Joe Biden you simply make things up about your opponent’s policies. While stumping for President Obama in Wisconsin, Joe Biden warns the crowd that Governor Mitt Romney will cut taxes by “five-hundred trillion dollars!” Wow! Clearly, the former made up statistic that Romney would reduce taxes by five trillion bucks (a claim that has yet to be substantiated) wasn’t sticking so it’s time to ratchet up the fear machine.
Before you’re ready to buy into the latest Bidenism, we should go against tradition and introduce a fact into this discussion. According to the federal reserve the total amount of money available in the world is approximately 8.3 trillion dollars. Vice President Biden is suggesting that Mitt Romney will cut taxes by more than 60 times the total amount of available funds on planet Earth. Then again, we know how the elderly can sometimes exaggerate. Senior moment perhaps?
Lesson to Kids: Don’t Tell the Truth
That’s the moral of the story for Andrew Berry. The 8 year-old third grader attending public school in Georgia learned the hard way that telling the truth can be very costly.
After a weekend spent with his grandfather in which Berry practiced shooting his BB Gun, the boy accidentally left the weapon in his backpack. Naturally when he arrived at school and discovered it was still in his possession he did the right thing and immediately informed his teacher of the mistake. Shortly thereafter, Berry was called into the principal’s office where he then found out he was being suspended for at least ten days as he was in violation of the school’s zero tolerance policy regarding “weapons”.
Of course it gets worse: As is required by Georgia state law, a police report was filed and Berry must appear before a juvenile court. It is entirely possible that an 8 year-old boy may now have a juvenile criminal record for possessing an unloaded BB gun; one that he accidentally brought to school and upon realizing his mistake reported to the proper authorities.
What did you learn in school today Andrew Berry? That it’s better to lie or cover up your mistakes than to tell the truth. Submitted here as reason number 12,372 why zero tolerance policies make zero sense. Oh, and, another great moment in public education history!
Also on This Episode
– “I’ll take melodramatic radio hosts for a thousand, Alex”, The answer is: This host cried on the air again and pronounced that he ‘officially no longer recognizes this country’. “Who is Glenn Beck?” …Correct!
– Speaking of broadcast personalities: Having burned most of his bridges, Keith Olbermann is having trouble finding a job. The guy that was fired from a network run by Al Gore for being too crazy is still having difficulty finding work. Hard to imagine, isn’t it?
– Remember highway 130 that opened in Texas, you know, the one that boasts the nation’s highest speed limit of 85 mph. It now has the nation’s fastest speed, with the blessing of local authorities… so don’t get any ideas.
– Sad: Man’s wife dies. Touching: Wants him to always remember her. WTF: By having a mould of her vagina sculpted into her tomb stone. Reason: So he never looks at another woman’s privates again. Now that’s an epitaph!
– The pop chart finds the usual combination of bad, worse, bowel obstruction and entertainment.
– A few thoughts on the one-sided and non-competitive world series that many expected… although they probably thought it would be the Tigers that would be administering the whoopin’.
October 29, 2012 at 7:22 pm
Nice show Mike.
I mostly commentary on the pop chart this time: Gangam Style has a bit of a simple explanation to the songs origins and the translation as well. It’s essentially a parody on Koreas spending habits. Yeah, weird. Even more weird that a random foreign song got popular, racking up 450million views on youtube in less than 6 months. But hey, remember a brief latin crazed inspired by the song no one understood? Ayyyyy macerena…
I’m not sure I understand your gripe with the fun. song. At least it’s tolerable. I assumed it was a song about a guy who got rejected at a bar. That’s the best I got.
Okay, I caved and googled it. Evidently it’s complaining about the mediocrity or dumbness of of lyrics today. I can’t disagree, though I don’t see it in the lyrics. It still sounds like a guy who got rejected at a bar. “But here they come again to jack my style”
On public schools, I again refer to the vagueness of the strict dress code in my own school.
Again, great show.
October 30, 2012 at 2:10 am
I agree James, as much as it’s not a song I’d buy, the fact that some random Korean song ended up making the jump from viral vid to actually charting is pretty amusing and I’m happy to see it chart! I don’t think anyone can actually take the pop chart seriously anyway, so eh, why not?
Also I think Glenn Beck is either emotionally unstable, or a very bad actor. Either way, it’s disturbing.
Great show!
October 30, 2012 at 5:56 am
James: I would have never thought of you as the type to like “Gangam Style”, but then it’s seems that with the emerging popularity of that ‘song’, I’m in the slim minority of those that hate it. It’s ridiculous, the pop chart used to have some, or even mostly, good music from top to bottom. These days it’s a needle-in-a-haystack to find a decent tune there. Of course there are other charts, but where’s the fun in that.
Public schools are almost as baffling as the pop chart. You would think common sense would prevail, but when dealing with government and bureaucracy it’s really all about the policy and red tape.
Carmen: Glenn Beck is emotionally unstable, you may recall the intro-sweeper I used to have for the “seven most salient, salacious and stimulating stories of the day”. In that clip there’s someone that screams in a very high, shrieking voice, “GET OFF MY PHONE!” that is Glenn Beck from his radio show… the context was that a woman had called in to ask him about health care and he pretty much lost sanity. Emotional instability is definitely the right diagnosis here, although you can mix in some generic phony personna and over-the-top Bible thumping and you’ve got him.