I Hope That Volcano Bought Enough Carbon Credits


European air travel has come to a virtual standstill as a result of an Icelandic volcano. My tongue comes to a virtual standstill as I try to pronounce the volcano’s name.

Arizona’s immigration enforcement legislation SB1070 came one step closer to becoming law. The national spotlight begins to turn toward the state as the controversy grows. The tenth amendment, the state constitution, federal and state law are apparently not enough justification to enforce the law… at least according to the bill’s opponents.

The White House now claims the most recent stimulus bill saved or created 2.8 million jobs. Proving that their statistics are not made up, they also claim that eleventy-eights of families will benefit from the zillions they will invest in the economy. Tune in next week when the White House claims only 836,779.2247462 jobs were saved or created, although that number will be substantially altered a week later.

On a related note, a new survey shows that nearly 8-in-10 Americans don’t trust the federal government.

Straight out of the stone age: A senior Iranian Cleric says that women who wear revealing clothes–ones where they may actually show their ankles for instance–are to blame for the recent earthquakes. I can’t imagine why we have such a hard time communicating with such an enlightened theocracy.

Also on this Episode: The pop chart makes our ears bleed and may cause rupturing of the anus.

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